Well it feels good to be back and posting. I was in hyderabad for a li'l family affair. Had a good time with friends and family. One can never get tired of their hometown, this was what I thought all this time, but this time around things were different.....hyderabad seemed different, with the Telangana Agitation, call for bandh every 3rd day, greedy autorickshaw drivers demanding more money.....it felt YUCK. To add to all this frustration...everyone looking at my tummy expectantly ......“Any good news?” enquired my sixty something neighbour aunty, as I stood outside the door waiting for my mom to open the lock. This year, my summer break in hyderabad began on that note. A deep interest displayed by a variety of people in our society – the servant maid, wife of the neighbourhood apartment's watchman, a friend’s mother, as they bump into any twenty something married girls they know.
The day before, I had invested about three hours of my journey time mentally preparing clever remarks that I would come back with to tackle the profound curiosity of friends, family and acquaintances about the success stories of my sex life. Yet, as I stood in front of a familiar face, no witty response came to my mind. Instead, I found myself mumbling something like “Not this time” and hastily walking away, realizing that no amount of preparation can train you for the bullet
"Any good news?"
The bad news is that it is launched infinite times, restrained and otherwise by a number of ‘relatives and friends’ and by the end of my stay, I had heard it all -
from the cautious - Are you and your husband happy?
the suggestive - Hasn't it been three years since your wedding?
the overly smart - Your classmate XYZ has named her second daughter ABC
and the outspoken - When is your mother going to have a grandchild to play with?
This time there were even orders
By this time next year you should be in the family way!
No kidding – by this time next year. Clearly adding a branch to the family tree is that straightforward.
Do not misunderstand me. I'm neither against the idea of having a family nor the frequent queries and suggestions annoy me. I only find it tedious to explain my life's plan to every third person I bump in to. Sometimes I find myself questioning the motive when someone innocently picks my brain.....most of the time I fail to discover a reasonable answer.
Since pretending not to have heard the question never works with family who are adamant to hear your story, I often try the “My husband and I are living together under the same roof. Isn't that great news in itself ” Mostly it works. Other times I surrender and listen to the scientific explanations and strong recommendations of these self-made family counsellors – “When I was twenty eight, I had my 3rd child” said an acquaintance (Clearly your recreation options back then were rather limited!), I was silently praying to end the conversation. After all, the REAL good news is that these nosy friends and relatives are an exclusive summer special this time.
Back in Goa once as I waited for the doctor at his clinic, a lady sitting beside me literally scanned my tummy with her eyes, when she realized that I caught her staring, she gave me that universal sweet smile. I knew what she was about to ask me, so without wasting her time I said "the tummy just looks big...but there is nothing inside". She was shocked for a second and then went red with embarrassment. Get one thing straight I can't be like others, I can't talk about things like why, when and how I plan to have kids, nor I keep pressing others to answer these questions.
As for my own parents and immediate family - they are not worried...Life is a jigsaw...every piece its takes time .....this one too will fall in to place.
My mom says "Leave it to God. He will make it happen when the time is right"
Easy. Isn't it?
Oh wait – Why is God a ‘He’? Well that calls for an entirely different post, doesn't it? ;) :P
